So you can pause it if you want


Friday, February 22, 2008

We Hit a Milepost


This little Prince Charming finally started crawling yesterday! Yea for Sawyer! Can you believe he'll turn one in one week?
See that uninspiring 90's vinyl floor behind Sawyer with it's uncomplimentary food crumbs? It's getting replaced tomorrow. It's going to be the best birthday Saturday ever.
I will take before and after shots, but since I really want to repaint the walls and paint my cabinets, and I'm even considering maybe doing this (if I decide I'm completely nuts to paint all that junk), the after shot won't be a true representation. Not that our little kitchen really is that exciting, believe me, I know.
By the way, attention all Twilight-obsessed people, you might enjoy this little snack.
Need a good chuckle? My sister-in-law, Little Miss Sassy Pants, has done it again--check this out.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

The White Flag is Flying

I give up. I give up on ever having a clean house again, or for that matter, clean children. (They manage to kill two birds with one stone). It's going to be hard, but I'll say good-bye to the dreams of having a home full of prettiness (I need prettiness or I get depressed). I'll cease desiring toilet paper rolls full of toilet paper and give in to going to the bathroom and finding the roll empty and it's contents in a puddle on the floor.
Walls without art work or corners without entire chunks of drywall missing, carpet without human waste, beds with mattresses and linens intact, furniture not being used as playground equipment, decor unmolested, meals calm and orderly, laundry always done, the car always clean, not finding dirty underwear under my daughter's bed, not tripping over kid mess at every turn, knowing where my toothbrush is, having any short-term memory again--I'm giving up all those dreams.
My house has finally become one of those houses I hated going into when I was younger (yes, even as a kid) where it was so disgustingly dirty and disorderly that I didn't like being there. Actually, truth be told, it hasn't finally happened, it's been like this for awhile, but I've been in denial.
Did I already mention I give up trying to make it look nice? I give in to having ugly hand-me-down and tacky Wal-Mart fake wood furniture for the rest of my life. I'll give up my dreams of ever having my houses even begin to even resemble something out of Better Homes and Gardens (yeah--I wouldn't mind it). I give up trying to decorate it or repaint it since I never seem to get it right and my kids are ready and armed, toys in hand, to destroy whatever progress I make.
I have yelled, screamed, sworn, threatened, cursed, spanked, and yanked, to no avail.
I'm going under now, and don't know when I'll surface, maybe when the kids are all in college (and I'm going to force them to go somewhere out of state). Then maybe I'll try again. But for now, I'm freaking throwing in the towel (that won't get washed for awhile). The children have taken over. I don't know how other people do it.

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Hosting...a New Read

Calling all Twilight series fans. I just read a preview to Stephenie Meyer's new book The Host. Looks interesting, but, here is a whole chapter from the book. Now my interested is piqued and now I can't wait for it to come out.
Happy reading!

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

So Sorry--

I just realized that I should not write blog posts late at night because they're a lot funnier at 11 P.M. than they are at 10 A.M.
Especially the parts about burping.
Now we know why I don't post every day--that involves too much self control.

Friday, February 8, 2008

One Down, Seven To Go

I've been reading (Wow--I just burped this huge, crazy belch--like none other I'd belched before--and I thought for sure something would melt on my monitor, or I'd fry some low-hanging nose hairs, but don't worry, everything's okay. Barq's does have bite.) this really cool blog--Nesting Place--for a while, that I have mentioned already, but she is a decorating genius. Unfortunately, regretfully, woefully, I have to admit that our decorating tastes and styles are not precisely the same, but the her budget-wise, practical, short-cutting but brilliant approaches to bringing about the decorating are simply fabulous.

And now that I've gone way over the top, I need a second, third, fourth, or fifth opinion. Using the Nester's excellent instructions, I've "mistreated" one of my kitchen windows using a $5 table runner from the quilt shop at Gardner's Village and some inexpensive calico that was the end of a bolt at JoAnn's, AND I didn't sew anything! I ripped of the edging stuff and left it, like she does here.


So anyway, here is the result of my first attempt. I didn't use any curtain rods.

Please ignore the fact that we need to buy a cover for the recessed light. And that my cupboards are ugly and need painting or restaining (a whole new, darker, color). Also disregard my uninspiring choice of wall paint color.

See all the mucky snow outside?

Dan didn't like this because he had to hunch over (more than usual) to see outside. Plus, this window faces south, and in the winter, the sun beats mercilessly--when it bothers to show it's face--and blinds us while we eat at the kitchen table--which sometimes doesn't happen in the morning.


My next attempt was this, even though I knew it wouldn't be permanent because we'd have to block Mr. Rarely-shows-myself Sun. I'm also not in love with the jumble of crap on the window sill.

Above (two images) is the final result involving a tension rod and safety pins. For some reason, I could not bring myself to rip the fabric in half to make two panels, nor did I want to sew the loop-pocket-thingy to put the rod through, so I pinned it. I guess I wanted my fabric unmolested, or as my cool old man would say, unadulterated (that's how he likes his popcorn--no fat reduced and containing all it's natural flavor--enhanced with butter and salt, of course). Anyway, I've taken care of one ugly window in my house and have seven to go.


Now, here's where I need someone else's opinion: Something about this doesn't look right to me. I think it's something in the spacing, but maybe it's just that it's surrounded by imbecilic decorating (i.e. ugle cupboards and uninspiring paint color) and feels out of place in all it's glory.


Maybe it doesn't like looking at these naked things:


and it's insulted to have to share the same room with them. Please tell me why I had to take this picture before clearing dinner. And yes, I have high hopes that eventually we'll put molding on the door we put in literally right before the frigid weather hit. Ugh, and don't even get me started on the horrid fan/light fixture. There are so many things in this old house that need attention and we just do not have the time and money resources to get to all of them. At least Mr. Destructo looks cute. And his purple cup. And that cupboard on the right that only looks cute in this photo from far away and out of focus, but that's even another story. I've painted it twice. It still doesn't look right. I'm not going there.


I don't want to go here yet either, but check it out.


I bought a chest at a consignment shop for $115, suspicious of how good a deal I got, but it wasn't as stupid a buy as the wicker chair behind it on the left that's covered by a sheet (my only spare big piece of fabric not otherwise engaged) because it is falling apart.


I regret buying this chest because we really couldn't afford it very easily, and as much as I like black in it's place, I'm not liking it on this. It's sucking up all the light (remember how the sun don't shine much here?) and I know I want to repaint it something lighter, but I still have to fix that white cupboard and paint this:

My free dresser from someone's trailer in the line at DI. I've started peeling off the white paint to expose the lovely 60's sea foam green with teal knobs. Maybe I should leave it so it will fit in with our 1960's house.
There's too much to do before spring comes and the yard sucks up all our time and energy. Oh yeah, and here's another good idea on window treatments from the Nester.

And here are some new shoes I bought with Miss Amy. I wore the red ones to church today with a black dress and they looked awesome. (Today is really Sunday, but I downloaded the pictures a few days ago and couldn't figure out how to make the date different, so this is how it is.) Anyhow, how soon after the snow melts can we wear white shoes? I'm itching to wear the white ones. You can't see it, but they have those cool faux wood heals that are higher than the heels on the smoking red shoes, which you also can't see, I just realized. By the way, this is my first venture into high heel wearing, and I thought I would kill myself at church (luckily the parking lot and sidewalks were snow-free because it's finally melting in our local heat wave of mid-40's temperatures), especially while I did Singing Time in front of all the kids at church and I didn't want them to make fun of me. Kids are brutal. Except for my own little sweethearts, of course.

Wednesday, February 6, 2008

Redecorating is Child's Play


Remember how I mentioned once that my kids like to redecorate my house? Well, other than having the notion that toys spread everywhere and food crumbs all over the floor are the newest trends in decorating, they're really into...

murals (i.e. wall art--this one compliments of Mr. Destructo)

door art (compliments of my 5-year-old curly one)

and dresser (that I put four coats of paint on to get it right!) art (compliments of the curly one again).
And below--yes, Crayola colored pencil works very well on sheets. Now don't get confused, those Nemo sheets are Lexie's, NOT Hyrum's. We tried to get her to pick girl sheets, but she was dead set on these. Apparently she wanted to add a girly tough with the purple pencil.
Mom's bed looks better without linens.
It took a lot of courage to post this picture of my not-so-dynamic bedroom that always gets decorated last and is still afflicted by a borrowed headboard that's just there to be there until it's replaced with something better, and my husband's mess in the corner, and I think I need new sheets--the old ones started falling apart and all that's left of them is the blue top sheet. Like the old Strawberry Shortcake (from the 80's!) and Girl's Camp medallion pillowcases?

I know I didn't put those chairs there and I'm so sure that polar fleece is the new rug.

Worn out from all the redecorating.

(Do you like where I vauumed my already ugly hand-me-down couch?)

I think they are dead set against me having my house look anything like the Nester's.

(Whose blog I have an unhealthy obsession with.)

By the way, when I discovered that Lexie had drawn all over her dresser (need I mention I think she's way too old to be drawing on the walls and furniture? Apparently not) I was furious and it almost ruined my whole Sunday, I was so mad about it (that, and it was snowing again) until I was getting Mr. Destructo dressed for church.

While I was helping him put on his pants, he was rubbed my nylon-enshrouded legs and said, "Ooh, pretty Mommy."

He could melt the Ice Queen's heart. Well, until he messed his britches.

The New Hairb

Eggs, anyone?
Want to guess what he was saying at the moment?

Tuesday, February 5, 2008

Pictures of Me

This is kind of fun.
Here's what you do:
1-answer the questions
2-type your answer into Google image search
3-use the first picture that comes up


(I cheated and picked the first one that worked best.)


Age you will be on your next birthday:

(27)


Favorite Food:

I'm hungry.




Favorite Color:


Periwinkle.

A Place I would Really Like to Visit:

Here's what came up for "cottage gardens in England".


Pet Name:


My mom named one of our cats after the this guy. I wanted to name him Sherbet. Since the other cat is dead (and I couldn't find a good picture for his Sly name) I didn't add him.


Place Where I met my other half: Exciting, huh?

Favorite Animal:

Bad Habit:
Blogging.

Watching television.


Favorite Holiday:



Favorite Pastime:


Reading.




"Decorating on a budget."

Sunday, February 3, 2008

Lurking in the Shadows

Now that I've set up that map on my blog and read Jamie's and Amy's blogs, about blog-stalking, I'm curious. I too want to know who's reading my less-than-stellar blog entries about poopy diapers and children taking it upon themselves to redecorate the house according to their desires. So, for all my sympathy readers: Leave a comment. If you're a long-lost friend, or a complete stranger, I want to hear from you. Come out of the shadows and talk to me.
But please, keep it clean.

Friday, February 1, 2008

Help, Again

Now can someone tell me how you make links out of words to other sites?
That one is totally eluding me.
That, and how people cross out words.
I've tried it over and over and don't know where I'm not getting it.
Thank-you.
While you're here, take a gander at my SIL's blog,
for a good laugh. Her link is on the side--I figured out those at least.
I think that everyone in Northern Utah that got more of the "s" word dumped on them last night could use a laugh. Has anyone else boycotted shovelling this year?